每个时代 都有无数的传奇 Every era has its own legend
有些传奇 能穿透岁月 成为不朽的记忆 Some legends will become immortal memories
在这个刀光剑影 快意恩仇的江湖 In this fierce combat and hating era
他 就是唯一的传奇… He is the legendary hero, the only legend...
圣上有旨 活捉小鞋匠 赏银万两 The Imperial decree arrived, this cobbler is reward for 12,000 silver
摘其首级者 官升三级 He whom will be official rises third-level if turn his head in
弟兄们 冲啊 Brothers, go...
冲啊 冲啊… Go...
人呢 Where is everybody?.
乖啊 小迪啊 爹要到边关打仗去了 Little Dee... father is going to a war
哈时候等你把洋文学好了 爹就回来看你 When your English is well learned, I'll returned
洋文 English?.
学洋文干哈 What English?.
西风东进嘛 学洋文肯定没错 Studying will enrich your mind, it's good to learn
小心点跑 Don't run too fast!.
别疯了 娘跟你讲的洋文你都背了吗 My dear, have you remember everything I taught you?.
过来过来 Come here now!.
都背好了 I'm well prepared
真的啊 好 Really?. Great
这是什么 What is this?.
来点屎 Shit
欸 答对了 Yea ~ Well done
狗屎 Dog shit
猫屎 Cat shit
对 Great
耳屎 Piece of shit
欸 好 Good
鼻屎 Horse shit
最后一个 Last one
你死 You die
我死 I die
好 Good
都死 We all die
Does之后 Does what?.
完蛋了 Game over
全答对了 耶… Corrected ~ Yea
耶… Yea
嫂… Sister-in-law
小林 Lin?.
小林 你怎么来了 你…你哥呢 Why are you here?. Lin. Where is your brother?.
嫂子 My dear sister-in-law
你这是干什么 What are you doing?.
这是弟兄们凑的 This is from all of us
他是为国家捐躯的 这抚恤金应该由国家出 He died for his country, the country should and will pay for everything
怎么啦 他不是战死沙场吗 What's wrong?. He didn't die in a battlefield?.
哥哥是…战死纱帐 Brother was die... in a girls arm
嫂… Sister-in-law
孩子还小 Kids are still young...
没必要让他知道 ... no need for them to know
你哥是为谁捐躯的 Who's the girl?.
我希望…在孩子的心里 I hope this will never be discover
他爹…就是个大英雄 To the kid, his father is always a great hero
等会儿 家伙事都不拿你怎开工啊 你开工 Hey you, how are you going to work without the tools?.
一天到晚稀哩呼噜的 你究竟寻思个哈啊 What's in your mind?. You dumb head
我走了 I'm going now!.
冰糖葫芦… Candy haws...
新书上市抢先看 狄仁杰巧断焚尸案 New books on the market, Detective Dee in body burning case
赵氏孤儿青蜂侠 非1非2飞子弹… Green Hornet, the long lost son. And Flying bullets...
老板 我要最新的飞剑 Hey boss, give me the new series of Flying Sword
喔 最新版的啊 Oh, the newest series
飞剑练到第几层了 What level are you now?.
看看 别那么小气 Come on!. Be nice!.
这么小心眼儿 What's wrong?.
看看怕哈啊 瞧你成那个样 Don't be mean, come on
我也有 I have one too!.
你那是老版的 只练到第一层 That's not yours, and it's the old version
我这练到第八层了 Mine is a 8 series
八层六层的 8 series my ass!.
我的书长得比你的那个大耶 My book is much bigger than yours
你怎不说呢 Why didn't you say so
怎不说呢 Why didn't you
我自个儿又不是没有 不是呗 I've one at home, also!. Right!.
这一炮打鼻子上了 Nice one
好 中他一飞镖 Great!. Bulls eye
这鞋能补吗 Can this shoe be fixed?.
能补 脱了吧 Yes, can you take it off now?.
你补鞋的方式挺特别的 You have a very unique hand!.
嗯…习惯了 这样方便 Hmm... I'm used to it!. Easier this way!.
知道吗 Do you know...!.
行走江湖 鞋是关键 ...shoes are a key point for those swordsmen to go from town to town!.
如果鞋子不舒服 脚就不会舒服 就会起泡 Uncomfortable shoes will hurt the feet!.
脚起了泡再好的轻功 没有用 When the feet is hurt, the power in Kung-Fu will decrease
你会轻功吗 Do you know Kung-Fu?.
不会 No!.
飞剑呢 Flying swords?.
飞剑 Flying swords?.
就是用丹田之气祭出一把飞剑 The Flying sword means you can control a sword to fly with Dan Tian and kill
取仇人首级于千里之外… Kill people miles away...
不会 No!.
走江湖更重要的是 真人不露相 The honorable person does not reveal the true nature
就算会 也不告诉你 I'll not tell you even I know anything
真人不露相 The true nature is not revealable?.
决斗了…我的妈啊 决斗了… They are battling now!. Uh-huh!. Over there!.
在那边 打起来了… Over there!. My God!.
好了 Ok now!.
喂 喂 我还没给钱呐… Hey, hey!. I have not yet pay...
交个朋友 下次一起算 Let's make friends, you can pay next time!.
你走路眼睛不长啊 Are you blind?.
这两位大侠 武功那是相当了得 You both are amazing, my heroes
左边那位 练得是七七九十六路王八拳 A man on the left is specialize in Tortoise boxing
人称钻石老大男 People call him "A Diamond Man"
右边那位 使得一手好板砖 On the right, people call him Board brick man
专打老弱病残 He is specialize in torturing olds, weak and youth people
决斗 决斗 决斗… Fights!. Fights!. Fights!.
叶城主 你的剑呢 Master Yeh... where is your sword?.
剑在心中 你的剑呢 Sward in heart, how about yours?.
杀你 还用不着使剑 To kill you, do you think I really need a weapon?.
你好大的口气 Such a big tone!.
口气大 是因为上火了、牙龈发炎… My tone is big because... I have a gum inflammation
你可以试试这个 You can try this!.
静慈庵枇杷蜜炼养生糖 Temple Jin-Chi sore throat syrup candy
选用岭南枇杷和野生蜂蜜精心熬制的 It's made by fritillary, loquat leaf and many natural herbal
长期服用可达到清新口气 增强内力之功效 It relief your sore throat, and gives you more Kung-Fu power
你也可以试试这个 贱人堂速效救心丸 You may also try this, Bitch ass heart medicine
像我们江湖中人 风里来雨里去 A son of a bitch like us in this battle world
生活不规律 身体迟早出问题 Life with no rule, unhealthy living
记住 贱人堂速效救心丸 耶 Remember, you need this Bitch ass heart medicine for a healthy heart.
每次都这样 Give me a brake!.
老整置入性广告 大家都傻呀 Product placement ads again, what the hell?.
你看 这颜色挺好看的 Nice color!.
还不错 Not bad!.
我也要试试看 I want to try it, too!.
好漂亮喔 It's beautiful!.
你们看 那傻小子又来了 Hey look!. Dumbass is here again!.
逗逗他 Let's play with him
好啊 好啊 Ok!. Why not!.
补鞋的 过来啊 Come here, you little cobbler
左脚右脚左脚右脚… Left, right, left and right...
你找死 You punk!.
你采花无数 罪孽深重 今天要付出代价 You must pay today, you rapist pervert!.
我最想采的就是你这朵花 我们上床溜溜 Don't you know how much I want to rape you?.
你无耻 You pervert!.
刚刚哪个用鞋丢我 Who throws shoe at me?.
刚刚是你用鞋子丢我的 Was you?.
这个鞋子不是你的吗 Is this your shoe?.
信不信我砍了你 I am going to kill you
刚刚是你的脚 Was that your foot?.
鞋是我补的 有什么事冲我来 I'd fixed the shoes, any problems?.
闪开 你打不过他的 Go away!. He will kill you
你不会武功 还要英雄救美啊 Are you out of your mind?. You don't know Kung-Fu
等一等 你听说过飞剑吗 Wait!. Have you heard about flying swords?.
我就是蜀山飞剑门第七百二十八的传人 I am a 782 generations of Shushan flying sword posterity
飞龙在天 Flying dragon!.
你没事儿吧 Are you ok?.
你们两个活腻了 跟我斗 Are you sure you want to fight with me?. Both of you?.
我就成全你们 I'll finish you both now!.
你别过来 你别过来 Don't come any closer, go away!.
又怎么啦 What now?.
没有同情心 你看他受伤啦 You are so heartless... looking at him, he is hurt!.
没事吧 Is everything ok?.
我的妈呀 My gosh
你看我帮倒忙了 这咋整啊 What have you done, my gosh!.
我第一次练没练好 没飞好 That was my first time, my first flying sword tryout!.
不好意思 不好意思 I am sorry, so sorry!.
你别过来 你别过来 Go away!. Don't come near me!.
我要你的命 I'm going to finish you now!.
玩我 去死吧 What?. Go to hell!.
暗器 你…好…你好卑鄙呀… A hidden weapon?. You despicable scum
不是我 是他自己撞上去的 It wasn't me, he hurt himself!.
我欠你一条命 I owe you a life!.
以后有事可以到泰山找我 Come to Mouttain Tai whenever you need my help
你不能走啊 你走了我就成了杀人凶手啦 You can't go now!. I'll be a murderer if you go now!.
此人叫田扒光 是个通缉犯 His name is Pa-Kwan Tain
你可以拿他的尸首 You can take his dead body
到衙门换三千两银子 to any government office and have 3,000 silver reward
后会有期 See you soon
你鞋 Your shoe!.
你的鞋子 Your shoe!.
泰山那么大 我上哪儿去找你啊 Are you kidding me?. Mountain Tai is so big, how am I going to find you?.
裁军的事 兵部拿出确切的方案了吗 About reducing the armed forces, did Ministry of Defense do anything yet?.
厉将军已经着手准备 It's in process now
半年之内 应该可以完成 Six months, 6 months should be enough
半年 太磨蹭了吧 Half year?. Don't you think is too long?.
二十个百姓养一个兵 20 civilian needed to feed only one solider
这么多的兵 再多的百姓也养不起 This is not the right way to do so
叫他们抓紧一点 Rush them!.
奴才明天就去催 I'll do it tomorrow!.
月露最近怎么样 How's Lady Moon recently?.
回皇上 刑部侍郎尚书说 Your Majesty, Minister of Justice reported in today
月露娘娘刚刚杀了一个通缉犯 Lady Moon just killed a fugitive today
是你派去的大内高手干的吧 Did you send the professional killer?.
纵观历史 敢在大婚前离宫出逃的皇后 According to the history, she is the only one
她是第一个 Who ran away before the wedding
为了逃婚 居然敢火烧祈宁宫 In the escaping, she even burned down the palace
这种皇后…留她何用 She is a hopeless empress!.
失火啦 快来救火啊 Fire!. Somebody help!.
着火了 快点救火啊 快来人啊… Fire!. Somebody help!. Fire
娘娘出逃 无非是图个新鲜刺激 It was a careless mistake, Empress was trying to have fun
老奴听说 这次的武林大会 娘娘也会参加 I heard this year's Kung-Fu tournament, Empress will be in the contest
到时候 我会安排让娘娘成为武林盟主 At the time, I'll arrange Empress to be the number 1 contestant of all
皇上也会亲临现场 为武林盟主颁奖 And your Emperor, will be awarder for Empress
然后接娘娘回宫 And take Empress back to palace after all
厉将军 这个机会千载难逢 你可要好好把握 General Lee, This will be your honor to gain a trust for Emperor
是是是 Yes sir...
送公公 Thank you sir...
办完这事儿 After this is done
你就可以回家跟老婆孩子团聚了 You can go back to your hometown and live with your family
乖啊 小迪啊 爹要到边关打仗去了 Little Dee... father is going to a war
哈时候等你背熟这唐诗三百首 爹就回来了 Whenever you finish reading Three Hundred Tan Poems, father will be back
我欠你一条命 I owe you a life!.
以后有事可以到泰山找我 Come to Mouttain Tai whenever you need my help
老兄 你叫什么名 Hey brother!. What's your name?.
月露 月亮的月 露水的露 Moon, my name is Moon, Lady Moon!.
月露 是个女的 Lady Moon, she is a girl!.
娘 Mother!.
衙门来人说 你杀了个通缉犯 The official came and told me you've killed a fugitive
对呀 That's right...
对什么对 What's right?.
敢跟贼人动手 你不想活了你 How dare you to fought them, they might have kill you
娘 我当时还不是为了救人吗 Mother, I've no choice but to save a life
你救人 人救你还差不多呢 Saving a life?. The fact is you need someone to save you!.
我…我顶亏没让你学武啊 I was right for you not to learn Kung-Fu
你要学了武 If you've learned
不知道还要给我惹多少麻烦事 你知道吗 I'll be living with your troubles by now
娘…娘 您别生气 娘…娘… Mother... mother... please... mother...
娘… Mother...
我去衙门领赏 I'm now going to claim my rewards
你在家闭门思过 哪都不许去 you stay home and go no where!. And I mean it
爹啊 欠人家东西不还是不对的 My dear father, it is not right to be a debtor
但是我娘不让我出去 Mother told me to stay home
我总得把鞋还给人家吧 At least I need to return the shoes to its owner
你说对吧 Am I right?.
《大笑江湖》- 小沈阳 作词：高进 作曲：高进
♪ 我手拿流星弯月刀 ♪
♪ 喊着响亮的口号 ♪
♪ 前方何人报上名儿 ♪
♪ 有能耐你别跑 ♪
♪ 我一生戎马刀上飘 ♪
♪ 见过英雄弯下小蛮腰 ♪
♪ 飞檐走壁能飞多高 ♪
♪ 我坐船练习水上漂 ♪
♪ 啊 林子大有好多的鸟 ♪
♪ 啊 做好事不让人知道 ♪
♪ 啊 是是非非惹人恼 ♪
♪ 啊 啊 ♪
等等… Wait...
等等 不要开船 还有我 Wait for me please...
等等我啊 Wait for me
♪ 江和湖波浪滔滔 ♪
别开船 等等我 Don't go, wait for me
♪ 看我浪迹多逍遥 ♪
♪ 谁最难受谁知道 ♪
♪ 天下第二也挺好 ♪
♪ 风和雨来的刚好 ♪
等等 等等我们 Wait... please wait
♪ 谁比我的武功高 ♪
♪ 大笑一声地动山摇 ♪
♪ 江湖危险快点跑 ♪
爱看武侠 In love with Kung-Fu books?.
对呀 平时我都是偷着看别人的书 Yes, I love reading other people's kung-Fu books
这本是我自己买的 But this book belongs to me
你看 Look!.
随书还附赠蜀山剑谱呢 This came with the book also
狠吗 Cruel?.
太吓人了 So scary!.
开始 Let's begin!.
喊 Shout!.
都…都趴下 Get down...
你站着 You stand still
你怎么还往前来呢 Why are you still coming forward?.
别动 Don't move!.
告诉你们个好消息 我们是打劫的 I've a good news for you, we are here to rob you
把真家伙事拿出来 Take the real stuff out!.
你们认识这是什么东西吗 Do you know what this is?.
告诉他 Tell him...
这是崩鱼的 This is fish bomb!.
崩人的 没人拿钱是吧 It's bomb!. Where is the money?.
放一个 让他们知道它的威力 Show them how this works!.
老大 太成功了 Hey boss!. This is fantastic!.
妈呀 鱼 My gosh!. Fishes!.
老大 崩这些年的鱼 鱼自己上船了 Boss, check this out, fishes jump on the boat itself!.
大伙看看他 鱼儿离不开水 你们离不开船 Take a look, fish are dying and if you want to live
如果不交钱 你们下水 鱼上船 Better show me to money or everyone out the boat
拿钱 Get the money
看他干哈呢 那小子藏什么呢 What's wrong with him?. Is he hiding something?.
干哈呢 什么玩意 什么玩意塞进去 What the fuck?. What was that?.
我看塞的是哈 Let me see!.
鞋呀 A shoes?.
很值钱嘛 放手 我要你放手 It looks valuable!. Let go now!. I say let go now!.
给你三秒钟考虑 3 . 7 . 9… You have 3 seconds!. 3. 7. 9...
要鞋不给 要命一只 You can take my life, but not the shoes!.
放手 Let go!.
我让他放手的 I told him to let it go!.
老大 我都弄到手了 I've everything now, boss
你在那儿查什么数 What's wrong with you?.
为了一只破鞋 连命都不要了 You are willing to die for just a shoe?.
这是别人的鞋 我得还给人家呀 This is not my shoe, I'd need to return in back to its owner
男人 A real man!.
男子汉大丈夫要信守承诺 言出必行 A real man has to do what the real man has to do
看来你是江湖中人 You are an honor and gallantry man
好吧 那就按江湖的规矩办吧 Ok!. Let us settle this in honorable way!.
单上还是一起来啊 Everybody come in one piece!.
你… You...
会…会武功咋的你啊 You know Kung-Fu well enough to fight?.
不会啊 Nope!.
听见没有 Can you hear that?.
不会 Nothing!.
不会就不能跟我交手 跟他过几招 I don't fight with civilian, I'll have someone else to fight you
我来 老大 I'll, boss!.
小子还不用这个 Don't need this to fight him!.
老大 你告诉我 你是要他命还是要他鞋 Boss, do you want his life or shoes?.
我想都要呢 What about both?.
就这么定吧 Get both!.
好 Ok!.
你们俩过几招 You will fight him
今天 你…要是把他赢了 You, if you win today!.
这船上的人 都得救了 You save everybody on the boat!.
如果你没了 If not...
一命抵一命 A life for a life
君子一言 驷马难追 A word spoken is past recalling
认识剑不 Know anything about sword?.
老大 他拿哈呢 What is he using?.
他拿什么玩意 What the hell is that?.
书 A book
书咋回事 A book...
认输了 Do you give it up now?.
认输了… You give up...
认输就把鞋拿来 放你一条生路 Loser, give me your shoes and I'll let you stay alive
还作揖 这时作揖有哈用啊 Stop bowing!. Do you think that's going to help?.
刚才干哈… What was that?.
老大 你看他干哈呢 What's he doing?. boss
小鹰展翅 Hawk spreads the wings
他抽筋了这是 Is he having a spasm?.
不是不是不是抽筋… That's not a spasm
这是仙人摘桃 It is Kung-Fu Peach picking fist
你小子 你太哈玩意儿 你撒什么谎 You dumb ass!. Get lost
你练过武功你就说练过武功 Just tell us you know Kung-Fu and be honest
还撒什么谎呢 Stop lying
练过你就跟练过的打 别跟我打 Fight with someone your own size, not me!.
他练过喔 He is a fighter!.
他是专业我业余的 他赢我不光采 He is a pro and wants to fight me, shame on him
你给我上 Go now
老大你上 你练过 You are the pro, boss!. You go!.
什么玩意 谁 What the hell
没看清 一股风咻一下 Who was that?. So fast like a wind blown!.
你看看是不是还有人 Look around and see if you can find someone else here
怎回事 What's going on?.
看清了 I've seen everything
脚 A foot!.
谁的 Whose?.
他的 His!.
你会武功 You know Kung-Fun
我不会武功 I don't
撒谎 Liar!.
我真没练过 我这是第二次跟别人交手 I really don't!. this is... second fight in my life
你根本就没用手 你这叫交脚 You didn't even use your hands, we call that Scissor feet!.
这…这是什么活这是 What?. What the hell is that?.
太厉害 So remarkable
这是脚活 太业余了 你那哈 We call that Scissor feet kick!. I know is amateur!. So what!.
你们俩打吧 我回去 我不能跟这种人打 I can't fight him!. He is so amateur!. You two go ahead!.
马雷子上 Horse Ray, it's your turn!.
老大 我也上不了 Boss, I can't
老大 我初吻没了 Boss, that was my first kiss
别说了 赚这么大便宜还说什么呢 Enough, you have made your points
你命里就不应该有这个 You shouldn't have this in your life!.
我这也没了 快去 Same here!. Go now!.
老大…老大 他专业的 Boss... he definitely is professional
别动啊 Don't move!.
我告诉你我可没认输 I'd never give it up
你别动 别动 You, don't move, don't move!.
老大 他绝对是专业的 Boss, he definitely is a pro
没事儿 我已经看清了 我来 It's ok, I've seen his entire move!. Let me fight him
倒计时3 . 9 . 7…加油 Final count down 3. 9. 7....
加油 老大加油 加油啊 Go boss, go finish him!.
加油、加油… Go!. Go...
老大 老大 没事吧 老大 快起来 Get up boss, get up!.
什么脚力啊 What was that?.
书…书… A book... book...
怎么回事 What's going on?.
不对呀 This is not right
你等会儿来 Wait a moment
这本书从哪来的 Where did you get this book?.
我在地摊买的 A fleet market!.
盗版货 The book is a pirate copy!.
倒版 那你正过来看两页再跟他干 You mean piracy?. Turn the book other way around and make it authentic then
废话 Shut up!.
咱连个年轻的小雏都没有打过 Shame on us, we can't even win a juvenile
今后还怎么在江湖上混呢 How are you going to survive for the rest of our lives?.
是的老大 江湖险恶 不行就撒啊 Yes boss!. It's a jungle out there, we must leave now
年轻人 Young man
（愿力量与你同在） May the force be with you!.
英文 听懂了吧 别太放肆 没什么用 English!. Understand me?. You kiss my ass!.
专家 Hello pro
再说吧 言多必失 赶紧走吧 Enough, need to go now, let's go
画得不错耶 盗版整得也挺专业啊 Nice drawing!. Not bad for a piracy
小伙子 没事吧 Are you ok?. Young man
没事 就是有点晕船 I'm fine, just little sea sick
心里面有点燥 感觉像火烤一样 I feel so hot, inside is burning...
那就深呼吸 舌头顶住上牙膛 缩紧嗓子眼 Take a deep breath, don't bite your tongue and relax
呼 吸 呼 吸 呼 Breath in, out, breath in, out...
小伙子啊 以后别随便跟人动手 Young man... try not to fight in the future
会出人命的 啊 You might get kill!. Uh?.
这本书你拿去看看吧 对你会有帮助的 Take the book and read it!. It will help you...
这怎么光有字 没有图啊 No pictures?.
♪ 不想再问你 你到底在何方 ♪ ♪ Will never ask you where you are ♪
♪ 不想再思量 你能否归来吗 ♪ ♪ Will never care when you return ♪
♪ 想着你的心 想着你的脸 ♪ ♪ Thinking of you, missing you ♪
♪ 想捧在胸口 能不放就不放 ♪ ♪ Love you more and more each day... ♪
谁 是人是鬼 我告诉你 我胆老大了喔 Who?. What?. Is it a ghost...?.
我小时候不睡觉的时候 我娘净给我讲鬼故事 Don't you scare me!. I've heard lots of ghost stories when I was a boy
你别吓唬我啊 Don't you try to bluff me
既然听过鬼故事 If you know things about ghost
那就应该晓得鬼是没有影子吧 You should know ghost don't have a shadow
有影 是人啊 真是人 I see a shadow... it's not a ghost!. It's a human
怎么回事啊 What are you doing?.
自古都是鬼吓人 我看你到底是不是人 I want to see if you are a real human or not
原来你真是人 You are not a ghost
药来 老子的迷魂药来 Hey, where is my magic potion?.
追魂散 A magic potion!.
红凤凰、粉凤凰 A red one, and a pink one
我要你们俩个先去把那个男的抓回来 I want you two go bring him back to me!.
施以酷刑 我们神农教要替田扒光报仇 Torture him, we need a revenge for Pa-Kwan Tain
追魂散 A magic potion!.
妹妹 Sister
解药 快 解药 红色的那一包… Give me the antidote, hurry!. The red one!.
红的 红的… Red one...
绿色的是断肠散 The green one is a poison potion
断肠散 你忘了我是红绿色盲 Poison potion?. You forgot that I am color-blind?.
我跟你说是红色的散 I told you the red one!.
妹妹 妹妹 妹妹啊… Sister!. Sister!. Sister...
都怪你…你害死我妹妹 往哪里跑 You killed my sister... I'm going to get you!.
我妹妹从小就比我强 My sister was brave than I am
能写诗 会画画 精通十以内加减法 She can write, read, and counting 1 to 1 0
小学还得过剪纸比赛三等奖 She even won a paper-cut fine art bronze prize
你还我的妹妹 Give me back my sister
从明天起 做一个幸福的人 Starting tomorrow, I'll try to be a happy person
喂马、劈柴、周游世界 Feeding horses, picking up firewood, lots of traveling
从明天起 关心粮食蔬菜 Tomorrow, foods will be my only concerned
我要一所房子 面朝大海 春暖花开 A big house, with open ocean views
开开开开…开 Lots of views, views...and views!.
我的般若多罗无相神功终于练成啦 I've finally achieved the Marvelous Kung-Fu ability
我终于可以重出江湖 The world is mine
俺的腿 我那百米九秒五的黑毛腿… My legs, my super jet legs...
谁啊 Who is it!.
小宝贝 你醒啦 Wow... hahaha... is my baby awake?.
我这在哪里呀 Where am I?.
你一会儿就会在我的肚子里面 You'll be in my stomach soon!.
你希望清蒸、红烧 还是刺身 Do you like it steam, pan-fry or sashimi?.
我好久没有洗澡了 I haven't have a shower for long time
那就剥了皮再吃 Then I'll skin you first and cook
不好吃 不好吃… No good... no good...
你练的是哈武功 What kind of Kung-Fu is that?.
我没练过武功啊 That's not Kung-Fun
没练过武功 哪来这么强的内力呀 That was a strong internal force I've never seen
我内力很强吗 A strong internal force?.
呼 吸 呼 Breath in, out, breath in
难道是他 It must be him?.
谁啊 Who is he?.
有一位老伯 我忘了问名字了 An old man, I don't know his name
他给了我一本书 He gave me a book
哈书 What book?.
叫九什么经 九…九经 Something like 99 and?.
九阴真经 The Nine Yin Manual!.
对对对对… That's right...
头陀 俺是不会跟你比武的 别再纠缠我了 Hey you, I'll not fight you!. Stop bothering me
当初是你找俺来 没有比就分开 我要比 You asked to be here!. I want to fight!.
俺说过了 不可能的 I told you, it is not possible!.
对 我们是绝对不可能分开的 That's right!. We are unseparable
你我之间亦如天雷勾动地火一发不可收拾 You and I are made for each other
不求同年同月同日生 但求同年同月同日死 I wish we both die in the same day
来吧 Let's do it now I'll be back!.
这些年来 我一直都想寻个机会 再跟他斗一场 All this years, I've looking for a chance, a chance to fight him
现在你的身上 有一道他的真气 And now, I found his Chi in you
我再帮你输入一道 I'll now give you my Chi
让两道真气在你的身体里头好好斗一斗 Our Chi will fight inside you
那就知道谁比较厉害啦 Soon or later will find out who's the best after all
他害得俺每天吃不饱饭 睡不着觉 I couldn't able to sleep well all this years because of him
洗不上澡 Not able to take shower
俺要把我流逝的青春 通通还回来 I want my years back, I want my everything back
回来 回来 回来 All comes back to me!. Everything!.
你醒啦 感觉怎样 Hey, are you ok?.!.
浑身没有劲 I feet so tired...
那就对了呀 That's it...
现在在你的体内已经没有真气了 内力全失 Now, all your Chi are gone...
为什么呀 Why?.
武功全废 All your Kung-Fu abilities are gone now!.
其实两股真气在你的体内 斗得是不可开交 As you can see... both Chi are fighting inside of you disorderly
在最好的状态下 应该是这样的 And is the way it should be You win, ya!.
但是呢 你现在的状况却是这个样子的 But now!. Look at you!. You lose, no!.
使不上劲 I feel powerless
想不想学武功啊 Still want to learn Kung-Fu?.
谁不想学武功啊 Who doesn't?.
学了武功以后 可以行侠仗义 I'll use my Kung-Fu to help people
上面我屋子里 有我毕生所学 Up there in the house, have all my lifetime Kung-Fu studies
你有没有兴趣啊 Have any interest?.
你为什么要教我武功啊 Why do you want to teach?.
我只是问你有没有兴趣 I'm just asking you have any interest or not
我可没有说要教你 It doesn't means that I will teach you
那可是我的心血之作 没有人看 It's my best pieces, but no one care
我会觉得好空虚 好寂寞 好失落… It makes me feel so lost, so lonely...
这就是我独创的般若多罗无相神功 I create this myself and is very powerful
我怎么看不懂啊 How come I can't understand a shit?.
练功最怕走火入魔 You'll go crazy and out of control for over practice Kung-fu
我的神功 能疏通经络 活血化瘀 My marvelous Kung-Fu will help you
帮你把内力调整到 Will help you to gain power
无色无相无法无天的最高境界 The power to where you've never achieve
我喜欢有图片的 I'd like the one with lots of pictures
有图的过目不忘 带字的一看就困 Picture will help me to remember, without it will turn me into sleeping beauty
旁边有个开关 有没有看到啊 Do you see there is a switch?.
这个是为了防止偷学武功的人 Switch is for those who try to steal my Kung-Fu skills
而设计的一个机关 A special made trap
千万不要碰 Never ever touch it!.
会爆炸的 It will blow up!.
早说呀 Too late now...
完了 我的般若多罗无相神功秘岌全完了 My God!. My marvelous Kung-Fu books is gone!.
你这个牲口 扫把星 我恨你 去死 It's all gone, you piece of shit, fuck off now
I don't wanna see u again… I don't wanna see u again...
玉娇龙 Lady Jade Dragon...
娇龙 Lady dragon
又来一个 Another one!.
慢走 慢走 慢走 这边请 This way, please!. This way
这间店已被朝廷征收 This place is taken by the imperial
请你们速速离开 Leave now!.
怎么回事啊 What happened?.
走 Go!.
走…去…别罗峻 快走… Go away now!. Go go go,
你们这是干什么 What the hell are you doing?.
赶紧走 Hurry up
还有你 赶紧走 看什么 Out!. Get out!. And you too
离开 离开 Get out!. Get out
天下风云出我辈 一入江湖… Everyday is not Sunday, I'm too old now...
我都自宫了 还找不到葵花宝典 I'm already castrated, still can't find Pandora's book
江湖盛传 欲练神功 必先自宫 To learn what's inside the Pandora's book, you need to castrate first...
你那么有诚意 先宫了先赢 First one who castrate, who win
皇天一定不会辜负你的 God bless you!.
皇天在上 东方求拜 My dear God, I'm Unbeatable
求皇天保佑 盼皇天让东方早日找到宝典 Please God, help me find the Pandora's book
本店已被朝廷征收 赶快收拾东西 This place is taken by the imperial, clean up now
搬出去 Out now
否则 送官府质问 Or you will be punish
小二 Waiter
客官 Yes...
给我一间上房 I need a room
好的 里面请 Yes, this way please...
掌柜的 Manager...
吓死人啊 What the hell!.
弄点吃的 Get me some food...
来了 It's on the way!.
这可是七十年的女儿红 This is best whisky I had for 70 years
不是贵客 我都舍不得开呢 Only for the VIP
来来来 我们敬头儿 Cheers, everyone, especially to our leader!.
头儿 敬你 喝 Hey boos, cheers
掌柜的 今天忙了一天辛苦了 你先喝 Manager, thank you for everything today, cheers!.
来 喝、喝 干了 Come on, bottom up!.
来 喝 Come on, bottom up!.
干 干 Cheers...
加 More
好酒 好酒 Nice, very nice whisky!.
把毒酒逼出来 Shit!. spill out
有人吗 Anyone home?.
什么事 客官 May I help you?.
有房间了吗 Do you have any room?.
本店客满 你到别处找去 Sorry, no vacancy!.
小二 给我来一个蚊香 Waiter!. I need an incense repellent...
好咧 Ok
月露 Lady Moon!.
我是小鞋匠 月露 I'm little cobbler
太巧了 你怎么会在这儿呢 Wow, it's you, why are you here?.
我来参加武林大会的 你呢 I'm here for the Kung-Fu tournament, and you?.
还你鞋呗 Here is your shoe!.
你跑这么远 不会是专程来还我鞋的吧 You must be kidding, came all the way here just to return my shoes?.
你试试 要不合适的话我可以再修 Try it on, I'll size it for you if it needs to!.
做生意做到你这种地步 服了 You're amazing, what a business man you are!.
确定是他吗 Are you sure is him?.
百分之百的是他 1 00% sure
此人当时掉下万丈深渊 还能活着回来 My God, this man is incredible
武功简直深不可测 He fell in a bottomless chasm!.
你为什么要自己做饭啊 能省几个钱啊 Making a meal yourself?. You must be kidding?.
不是钱的问题 行走江湖 安全第一 It's for my own sake, it's jungle out here
别人做的菜 如果下了毒呢 It's easy to be poisoned by others, especially on the food...
你真厉害啊 真不愧是老走江湖的呀 You're remarkable!. You're my man!.
一般一般 只是一些江湖经验而已 This is nothing, it's just an experiences...
那你在江湖上 算几流高手啊 What do you rank yourself in the world?.
如果我说一流 你信吗 Do you believe me if I say I rank myself number one?.
你不信 You don't believe me?.
信 I do believe you...
你不信 You still don't believe me?.
注意这个油灯 Watch this oil lantern
灭 Off...
再一次 灭 Again!. Off...
再一次 Again!.
灭 灭 灭 灭 灭… Off...off...off... off... off...
灭 Off
好 太厉害了你啊 Wow!. My god...
这就叫"剑气" This is "Sword Chi"
果然是一流的呀 You are number one...
真正厉害的武功 我还没有使出来呢 You haven't see the best yet, my dear...
太厉害了 Remarkable
你说你这么厉害 你爹你娘是不是可为你骄傲 Your parents must be so proud of you, being so remarkable...
他们才不管我的死活呢 They don't give a damn about me
非逼我嫁给一个连正眼都不看我一眼的工作狂 They make me to married someone who doesn't love me
你成亲了吗 Are you married?.
还没 差一点 Nope, almost though
只要晚走个两三天 我就被迫嫁人了 It was so close, I almost got married!.
那…你不是逃婚吗 Damn it... you must be a run away bride?.
是我逃婚 又不是你 你干嘛那么紧张啊 So what?. Why are you so worried then?.
没有 你知道吗 Oh!. No no no, do you know something?.
在我的家乡 In my hometown
逃婚的女人得被抓回来 A run a way bride will be punish
和他的奸夫一起浸猪笼 Put into a pig basket and drown to death
你在咒我啊 Are you cursing me?.
你又没有奸夫 Come on, you don't have an adulterer
我的手艺怎么样啊 How's my cooking?.
饭馆味 Nothing special!.
多吃一点 Eat more...
谁要是娶了你 就是上辈子修来的福啊 Whoever married you, will be a luckiest man on earth
舞剑带风 做菜好吃 Best in Kung-Fu, Also a good cook!.
那又怎么样 我从出生到现在 So what, my life was well planned without worried
人生的每部份都被安排好 Every since the day I was born
没有人问过我的意愿 No one asked what I really want
也没有人在乎我喜欢什么 And no one care what I really like
在他们的眼里 我只是个木偶 To them, I'm just a doll
从现在开始 我要按着自己的理想过生活 But it's all past!. I'll now live the way I want it to!.
那你以后有什么打算呢 Any plans now?.
当武林盟主 My plan is to be a number one Kung-Fu chief master
那你…以后打算在江湖上飘吗 Well... Do you still want to be in this mess up world?.
你有没有听过一种没有脚的鸟 Have you ever heard a bird call Phoenix...
从出生就开始飞 死的时候才落地 Live and burn till death
我觉得自己就像那只鸟 I feel myself strongly like it!.
喝酒吧 喝酒、喝酒 Forget it... let's drink up, drink
我头好晕喔 I feel so dizzy...
我也是 Me too...
脸好烫喔 My face is hot...
我也从来没有这样的感觉 I never have this feeling before
心里就像猫桡一样 My heart is burring
对不起 I'm sorry!.
为什么对不起啊 Sorry for what?.
你要不是为了还鞋 就不会进这家店了 I've lead you into this mess, It's all my fault!.
不进这家店 你现在也不会被绑… You wouldn't be here and being tight up for my shoes...
不关你的事啦 It has nothing to do with you...
是我自愿来的 你不用对不起 I want to be here myself!. You don't have to feel sorry...
你不需要安慰我 No need to comfort me!.
我说的是真的 其实我和你挺像的 I'm telling you the truth, I'm so much like you
从小到大 一直过着很平淡的生活 My life, was so dulled
我只有在每次看漫画书的时候 And ordinary until I read comic books
才能找到一种热血沸腾的感觉 It gives me a life, a fantasy dream world fill with life!.
要不是碰到你 我真的没有勇气出来 I was nothing, till I met you!.
眼睛一眨 这辈子可能就过去了 I could have an easy life till I met you!.
那你有后悔吗 Ever regret it?.
有一点 A little bit!.
因为我还没有看过一次真正的高手对决 Because I've not yet see a real fight
每一次都是卖假药的 耍把式的 All I've see is all bulled... and nothing but bluffing!.
高手对决 让我看一次 死也值了 I'd love to see it once for my life!.
想死…没有那么容易 What life?. Your life belongs to me now!.
我要把你们折磨的欲仙欲死 I'm going to make you both suffer!.
这个…是我们神农教独家秘方 This is my special potion
甲硝锉阿斯妥明 It's call niter nine nine nine
吃下去之后 内力瞬间放大一千倍 After you take it, your internal force will go ups to 999 times more stronger
把你的丹田涨破 And will blow up your Dan-tian
把你的肚子炸烂 粉身碎骨 Then your body will blow into pieces!.
这个…不是药 是蛊 This is not a medicine, it's Voodoo
中了蛊之后呢 This Voodoo
你的孝心会在瞬间放大一万倍 Will blow your love and filial into million pieces
涨爆你的脑壳 And then blow your brain
好让我涮火锅 So I can eat your brain with soy sauce!.
有什么招冲我使 Show me what you got...
你还是没有感觉 This is impossible!. Why are you still alive?.
怎么可能呢 Something is wrong!. Something is so wrong!.
我下毒还从来没有失手过 You dumb ass!. I'm a normal person who doesn't know any Kung-Fu,
我没有内力 你就是放大一亿倍也没有用 I'm a normal person who doesn't know any Kung-Fu, this won't work on me!.
没有内力 那你是怎样杀死田扒光的 You know nothing?. How did you kill Tian Pa-Kwan?.
田扒光 Tian Pa-Kwan?.
田…扒…光 Yes, Tian Pa-Kwan
他是自己撞到剑上死的 Oh... He fell on my sword and killed himself
那红凤凰呢 What about Red peacock?.
那也是她自己撞到你的剑上死的吗 She fell on your sword, too?.
谁是红凤凰 Who is Red peacock?.
你这个变态杀人狂 你到底杀了几个人 How many have you killed?. You freak
你连受害者的姓名都想不起来了你 You don't even know the names you have killed!.
要是教主知道妹妹怎么死的 I'll be so dead!.
我肯定死的很难看 If master finds out how his sister was killed!.
我先给你割个双眼皮 Let me give you a double-fold eyelid
我本来就是双眼皮 I'm already double-fold eyelid
不如你帮我开个眼角 顺便抹个腮吧 Why not give me a bigger eye corners, and a few make-ups
要不要来两针肉毒杆菌… Do you like a botulinus also...
才不要呢 那个笑起来会很僵硬的 Are you kidding me?. That's going to make my face so stiff
我才在两个礼拜前搞过 But I had it two weeks ago already
你平常是不是有按摩脸颊 Do you massage your cheek a lot?.
你有敷面膜吗 Do you do facial mask?.
有 芦苍保湿的那一款 Yes, an aloe mask only
那已经过时了 我现在比较喜欢的是火山泥 You so outdated, I use Volcanic mud nowadays
不但美容 用来泡澡 还可以瘦身呢 You can use it for facial, with shower, and it can slim your body too
可是我一直都做高温瑜珈啊 But we had practice in high-tempure Yoga already
你可以试一下呼拉圈 或者是有氧舞蹈 You can use hula hoop, or Aerobic dancing
Go…Come on, Go…Go…Go… Come on
你不要想糊弄我 Don't you try to bluff me
我告诉你…爱我的男人 被你的男人搞死了 Let me tell you something... my man, was killed by your man!.
所以 And now
现在我也要让你体会一下失去爱人的痛苦 I want you to feel my pain...
痛…那种痛… So painful... so hurt...
你冲着我来吧 要杀杀我 快 I'm the one you want!. Come and get me... now!.
小道士 Hey little monk!.
我正准备参加武林大会的 I'm on my way to the tournament
准备去投宿呢 And looking for a place to sleep
没想到你也在啊 And here you are!.
哇 好强的剑气 武功不赖呀 Wow... such a strong Chi!. Awesome!.
多亏了你那本书啊 Thanks to your book!.
这才几天啊 我就练成了剑气了 It gave me a great power, in only a few days!.
我那本书 My book?.
对啊 在船上…你丢的那本 That's right!. A book you trashed... the boat
喔 光有字没有图的那本书吧 Oh!. A book with no pictures at all
对啊 Correct!.
那你还我吧 Can I have it back?.
我也想练 赶紧练 I want it back and practice it myself!.
我…你再借我看看吧 看完保证还 告辞了 Can I have it for few more days!. Just few more days... bye now...
小道士 你什么时候还呀 Hey little monk!. Just for few more days, ok?.
30年后 咱们华山论剑 Sure... after 1 1 000 days!.
还要30年后… And that's about... 30 years
喔 耶 Oh!. Yea
那个武林大会你想去吗 Are you going to the tournament, too?.
想去 Yes!.
那你不去了吗 You not going?.
刚临死前 我一直在想 I was thinking, just now
我这次逃婚闯了大祸 After I ran away before my marriage
爹娘肯定愁到不行 还帮我背黑锅 My parents must be in deep trouble
哪有脸自称江湖中人 I feel so disgrace for myself!.
我挺你 无条件的支持你 I'm on your side, fully supporting you!.
如果下次鞋子再破了 记得来找我呀 If any of your shoe needs repair, remember to come to me!.
终身免费 Free for life time!.
唉哟 客官 买刀是吧 好刀 Hello!. Looking for a knife?. This is a great knife!.
你看你看 锋利的也有款式 Look at here... I have all kind the knife...
好剑 Nice sword!.
有人订了 It's taken...
出个价 Name your price!.
二十两 20 silvers...
便宜点儿 十五两 Come on... make it 1 5...
三十两 30 silvers!.
老大 亏 Boss, we're losing money...
四十两 五十两… 40!. 50 silvers!.
成交 Deal!.
拿钱 Money...
让开 Get lost!.
赶紧让开 Go away!.
这把剑是我订的 This is my sword!.
你订剑有用吗 切菜啊 Yours?. To use in the kitchen!.
你们是哪个单位的 Who are you belonging to?.
六扇门的 Department of sixth door!.
给我抓起来 Get them all!.
还真有不怕死的啊 What a bunch of fools?.
月露 Lady Moon...
对不起 I'm sorry!.
小鞋匠 Litthe cobbler...
你经常这样跟人搭讪的吗 Is this the way how you get girls?.
月露… Lady Moon...
你一定觉得很奇怪 我为什么带你到这儿 You must feel strange... why I bring you here for?.
为什么呀 Why?.
我想变个戏法 你想看吗 I've something to show you, do you want to see?.
想看啊 Yes, I do!.
怎么是你呢 月露… It's lady Moon... how could this happen?.
任务完成了 解药可以给我了吧 Mission accomplished, can I have a remedy now?.
来 Here!.
你说话不算数… You... big liar...
我不是言而无信 是江湖太险恶了 I'm not a liar, I'm just trying to protect myself!.
你们吵什么呢 刚才不是好好的吗 What's wrong?. I thought things are going fine on you both?.
你怎么会没事 You're not hurt?.
我刚刚不是把你的脖子扭断了吗 Didn't I just break your neck?.
我没有什么本事 就是脖子特别软 Don't you worry a bit, I've a super soft neck
偷看别人书练的 so I can peep into someones book
你看 Look!.
你可以不杀我了吗 Can you please not kill me?.
我杀人事不过三 这次就饶了你 I'll let you go and free you today
不过死罪可免 活罪难逃 But you'd be punish this time
老大 怎么了 舒服点没 Hello boss!. Feeling better now?.
我告你俩喔 这是我老大第一次做足疗 Remember one thing!. This is first time my boss have foot massage
一定要把穴位给打开 Make sure you do it right
使点劲 Harder!.
过来 Come here!.
起来 一点规矩都不懂 Get up!. Show some respect!.
头一回进来 蹲 First time here?. Get down...
你 把脑袋抬…抬起来 Hey you... show me your face...
老大 老大 你看 谁来了 Hey... boss... look!. Look whos here now...
什么玩意儿 What the hell?.
你看 你看谁 Look who's there...
求你们… Please...
使劲 Harder...
老大 小鹰展翅 Boss... Hawk spreads the wings
兄弟 兄弟 兄弟 Hey, brother...brother...
你搁这里你还扯这干哈玩意儿 What the hell are you doing?.
看住脚 Watch it...
没…没事 有链子 Don't worry, it's chained!.
太难受了 算是我求你们… This is too much!. Could you please...
别…别…别误会 Hey... don't misunderstood us...
大叔… Mr.
足疗就是这么回事 This is why we call foot massage...
刚开始我也不适应 一会儿就舒服了 It hurts in the beginning,... but very comfortable later on
不是 大叔 我就是一个补鞋的 No, Mr. I'm just a shoemaker
待遇太高了 我受不了啊 This is too much for me, I can't handle it...
你听听 听见没 Listen... did you hear that?.
听 Hear what?.
你们都听见他说哈了 Have you all heard what he said?.
这么大能耐 还这么平易近人 向人学不 Such a strengthful person, and so easy to be with, want to learn!.
学…学… Yes... yes
向…向… we all do
低调 真不玩了 No more... you sure?.
不玩…我们都是天涯沦落人嘛 No more, we're all in the same boat!. You know
以后大叔我们当朋友处吧 Let's all be a friends, Mr.
就是朋友嘛 Yes, be friends
对…对对对… Yes, friends...
朋友是吧 铁的 Let's all be friends, solid friends...
小鞋匠在我们手里 I have Little cobbler
想救他就去参加武林大会 You can save him if you join the tournament
否则撕票 Or else he will be dead
皇上如果能亲临现场观战、颁奖 Your Majesty, if you can present at the tournament and to award prizes
娘娘一定会非常感动 An empress will fell emotional!.
娘娘性子倔 未必肯低头认错 We all know how stubborn empress is
给她个台阶 她一定会下的 She'll never say sorry unless is a flawless excuse she can use
那好 决战之日 Ok... on the final day
朕先到泰山祭天 然后顺道颁奖 I'll be there after my worship and sacrifice to gods in mountain Tai
皇上圣明 Long life your Majesty!.
这…这是大逆不道啊 This is so impudent!.
天下好不容易才太平几天 After only a short period of peace time
这样一来 又要战乱了 Another war is on its way
请公公三思 Please consider!.
厉将军 应该叫你吴校尉 General Lei, or I should call you Major General Wu
你有今天 是因为谁呀 Who gave you all this?.
当初大战在即 Do yo still remember that night before the battle
厉将军死在妓院 when General Lai die in a whore house?.
为了稳定军心 我才让你冒名顶替 I let you used his name to stable the troops
当了十几年将军 You have been in a General for many years
让你白享了那么多年的富贵 Don't you like your richness?.
我那么做 我又不是为了享乐 I didn't do it for my own sake, I did it for the country
我…我退出 I'll now, withdraw from the troops
你不觉得 你现在退出晚了点吗 Don't you think its too late now?.
你不要忘了 你儿子还在我手上呢 Don't you forget something!. I've your son!.
快点 Hurry up...
兄弟 等这次越狱成功之后 Brothers, after this jailbreak
我就告老还乡了 再也不在江湖上混了 I'll be going back home, and never show up again!.
各位武林盟友 各位江湖前辈 Ladies and gentlemen, all my Kung-Fu allies
现在我们通过国际通讯卫星 We are now use satellite
对不起 那是五百年之后的卫星 Sorry!. Satellite won't be invented for another 500 years
在被我们现在进行一个 The Kung-Fu tournament is proceeding as planned
中华武林大会之现场直播 And it's a live show
场上女选手叫月露 Her name is Lady Moon
她面前的对手来自山西 And her contestant is from Shanxi
使的是霸王枪 He is using a King spear bun
霸王枪 由霸王洗手液特约冠名 King spear gun, a special sponsor by Kings hand cream...
意外再一次发生了 Accident happened again
很遗憾 摔了个屁墩 前功尽弃了 What a pity, such a big mistake, totally failure...
唉呀 你瞧这小子太狠了 Man!. He is no mercy!.
知道打女人甚么样的要害部位 He knows where and how to hurt a woman, big time
场上突然出现了不明飞行物 An unidentified flying object
男选手不幸踩到了香蕉皮 He steps on a banana peel
他正以猪八戒踩香蕉皮 结束本场比赛 It's over, this game is over...
传令下去 赏银万两 必须缉拿小鞋匠 Send my words... arrest Little cobbler, rewards will be giving
活要见人 死要见尸 Live or death!.
绝不能让他和将军见面 We must have him before General Lei!.
是 Yes!.
本场比赛男选手 This contestant is a tailor
是来自通州区六里庄的一位裁缝 And he is from Tongzhou District
复姓东方 武器就是飞针走线 His name is Dongfon, his weapon is a needle
说白就是针线活 A needle!.
女选手蹴不及防 Female contestant is so lost now!.
被缠住了头颈 向对手飞了过去 She is trap!. He is got her now
可以说是羊入虎口 She is in trouble...
女选手在最后一刻逃脱了 Damn, she is free now!.
男选手继续飞针 He continuously using his needles
最后 女选手用华山论剑之法展开了防御 Finally, she blocked his attack
两人一时间是舞得旗鼓相当 难分伯仲 What an equal match, totally amazing
男选手腾空而起 He jump!.
排山倒海 So high and so powerful!.
这一招威力十分的威猛 It so powerful!.
说时迟 那时快 Oh my god, my god
哎呀 男选手中了暗器 Wow, he is hit...
男选手怒不可遏 施展出传说中的吸星大法 He is so mad, he's now using Power-sucking punch
这种武功非常之邪恶 This Power-sucking punch is very evil
能让对手浑身虚脱 免疫力下降 It will lower your immunity, and collapse you
造成骨质酥松和肠胄不适 If you get osteoporosis or have a born disease
请选用贱人堂补钙片 This bitch ass brand calcium tablet will help you...
大脚印 Big foot!.
哎呀 见过大脚 没见过这么个大脚 Wow!. A Big foot!. Such a big foot
这一幕 好像在甚么匹克奥林运动会上见过呀 I've seen this in an Olympic before!.
六指足底按摩 Super six foot massage
带给您清新的脚步 愉快的心情 Will bright your life and eased your pain
看看这个 Take a look
好气派吧 So stylish!.
独孤 Lonesome?.
这是我的姓 It's my name!.
你姓独孤 What?. Your name is Longsome?.
告诉你 我祖宗的祖宗的祖宗是皇族 Yes... my ancestors was an imperial!.
留给我最大的一笔遗产 就是这个姓 They gave me a big inheritance, which is my name!.
这也是我身边唯一的一笔… It's also my only...
老大… Boss...
年轻人…你要想帮我 求你扛起这个大旗 Listen to me... I want you, to carry on
把我的姓传下去 Carry on my name!.
你必须答应我 You must promise me!.
我答应你 我答应你 I do!. I promise you!.
从现在开始 我就姓独孤 From now on, my name is Lonesome!.
（愿力量与你同在） May the force be with you!.
圣上有旨 活捉小鞋匠 赏银万两… The Imperial decree arrived, this cobbler is reward for 1 2,000 silver
水下面有炸雷 我去引爆 你赶紧跑 快 Under there is a torpedo!. I'll go detonate it, leave now!. Hurry!.
不 我不能扔下你 No!. I won't leave you alone
来 我背你 来 Here, let me carry you, come on
大叔 大叔 大叔… Mr... Mr...
大哥 你没事吧 Hello... are you ok?.
记住那句英文 别太放肆没什么用… Remember one thing, impudent won't do you any good...
大哥…大哥… Brother... brother...
将军 General
那个逃犯 多大年纪 How old is the fugitive?.
二十郎当岁 是个鞋匠 东山人 He is 20 something, and he is a shoemaker!.
他的名字叫哈 What's his name?.
吴迪 Wu Dee!.
这是一场本届九州武林大会之总决赛 Today is the final and we have two contestants left
女选手是华山派的月露 A lady Moon from Mountain Hwa
男选手杨过 来自刑部 他是大内第一高手 And another contestant Young Go, he is from ministry of Justice
两人将争夺本届大赛的总冠军 They both will fight for a champion today!.
本届大赛最大的惊喜 We have a big surprise for you all
是皇上亲临现场 为选手们加油 Emperor is here today, to cheer for both contestants
同时为获胜者颁发法琅冠军戒指 And also will award prizes to the champion
大赛即将开敔 Let the match begin
两位选手这时候就像过电一样 A flash went through both contestants
想起了父母 想起了祖宗十六辈 Remind their parents, ancestors, and more
他们这时候 Now
要把自己所有的血液都动员起来 Both contestants are ready to rumble
浑身上下所有的细胞 They can't wait to start the fight
所有的神经都投入最后的战斗 You can tell their muscle are to tense
哎呀 男选手突然掏出了白手绢 抛向空中 Oh my god, male contestant throw in the white handkerchief
这…这表示弃权啊 He gave up, he gave up the fight
本届大赛的总冠军是华山派月露 The champion will goes to, Lady Moon!.
臣女月露 叩见皇上 Your Majesty, my name is Moon
这次玩够了 可以跟朕回去了 Enough!. Should you come home with me now?.
保护皇上 Protect Emperor!.
护驾… Guards!.
皇上 先用白药止血… Your Majesty, stop the bleeding first...
住手 娘娘中了移魂术 鬼迷心窍 Stop it!. Empress is sick, she was cursed
所以才会袭击皇上的 That's why she attacked Emperor
皇上 公公手里那瓶是毒药 Your Majesty... it's him who try to kill you...
他想把弑君的罪名嫁祸给娘娘… It was a set up, he impute Empress, make seems like Empress did
公公 你答应过我 你不杀我儿子… You've promised, not to kill my son
可你现在…你对他干了些什么… Look at you, what have you done now?.
这…到底怎么回事 What the... what's going on?.
皇上 老奴要开创新的历史 改朝换代 Your Majesty, I'm making a history, a brand new history
做第一个太监皇帝 I'll be a first eunuch Emperor
你这个变态 欺君犯上 不得好死 You are sick, how dare you to defied the Emperor!.
我让你当上武林盟主 I made you a Kung-Fu master
你非但不谢我 反而还骂我 This is how you treated me, treat me like a dog
我要替皇上好好教训你 I'm gonna punish you today...
住手 Stop it!.
小鞋匠 Little Cobbler
你怎么来啦 Why are you here?.
你给我的邀请函我就来啦 I was invited by you!.
你快走 快走 Leave now... go!.
一帮老爷们欺负一个女孩算什么本事 You bunch of pigs!.
有本事你冲我来 Pick someone your own size!.
好啊… Sure...!.
小鞋匠… Little Cobbler!.
真不懂 多少人朝思暮想费尽心机 I just couldn't understand... This chair
就是为了坐上这把龙椅 So many people die to sit on this chair
朕只是想知道 I want to know
你是什么时候买通所有人的 How did you make them to go against me?.
他们每一个人都有把柄握在老奴的手里 I've their weakness
好赌的、好嫖的 一个都跑不掉 Gambleholics, sexholics, I've their weakness
死太监 Damn you!.
幸好我没有把柄在你手里啊 Lucky I have no weakness!.
你丹田中了我一掌 居然还没死 Why are you still alive?. Didn't I kill you?.
那我得多谢你那一掌啊 Thank you so much for the punch you've gave me
打在了我的丹田上 给我补了点内力 Punched on my Dantian, and gave me some power of it
这个…是我们神农教独家秘方 A special portion we've made for hundred years
吃下去之后 内力瞬间放大一千倍 After you take it, your internal force will go ups to 999 times more stronger
把你的丹田涨破 And will blow up your Dan-tian
把你肚子炸烂 Then your body will blow into pieces!.
我的神功 能疏通经络 活血化瘀 My marvelous Kung-Fu, will help you
帮你把内力调整到 To gain powerless power
无色无相无法无天的最高境界 The power to where you've never achieve
你啊 谋朝篡位 罪不可赦 How dare you to defy the Emperor, trying to take over his place!.
如果现在要认罪伏法的话呢 I'll let you die peacefully
可以保留一条全尸 If you give up now
全尸 Peacefully?.
自从我七岁进宫 就已经没有全尸了 I have had a miserable life now and before, my life isn't peaceful anymore
什么剑法 What is that...
宇宙剑法 Cosmo swordsmanship!.
无相神功 Marvelous Kung-Fu!.
再打呀 Give me more
别太放肆 没甚么用 Piece of garbage, useless you!.
你真是个练武奇才 You are one in the million...
这是我毕生所学 This is my whole life
就算给后代留下点东西 I'd love to have someone to carry on...
你人品那么差 写的东西好不到哪儿去 It looks so amateur, Are you sure is good?.
皇天在上 东方求拜 Long life Emperor, My name is Unbeatable
求菩萨早日让东方找到葵花宝典 Please God, help me find the Pandora's book
葵花宝典 Pandora's book!.
江湖传闻果然不假 欲练神功必先自宫 It's truth!. You need to castrade first To learn inside the Pandora's book
你没有自宫 You didn't castrade!.
没有自宫…也可练功 But I still can learn it!. Oh!. My god...
小鞋匠 你救驾有功 朕要奖赏你 Little Cubbler, I'd like to reward you
说 想要什么赏赐 Tell you what you want?.
回皇上 月露她现在还不想嫁人 Your Majesty... Lady Moon doesn't wanna get married yet
请您不要去逼她 Can you set her free!.
月露她现在说不想当木偶了 She doesn't wanna be a puppet anymore
因为她从小到大都… Because she never...
够了 我当不当木偶 关你什么事儿 Enough!. It's none of your business, ok?.
你把自己的破鞋摊顾好就是了 You just go fix your shoes...
♪ 能不能让我陪着你走 ♪ ♪ Here in the dark, among the road ♪
♪ 即然你说留不住你 ♪ ♪ Could I walk with you, before you go ♪
♪ 回去的路有些黑暗 ♪ ♪ Here on the road, among the darkness ♪
♪ 担心让你一个人走 ♪ ♪ I worried for you, to walk alone ♪
♪ 我想是因为我不够温柔 ♪ ♪ And I believe so, I'm not tender enough ♪
♪ 不能分担你的忧愁 ♪ ♪ Cannot share, your sadness though ♪
♪ 如果这样说不出口 ♪ ♪ If this is so, show me what I really need to know ♪
♪ 就把遗憾放在心中 ♪ ♪ Or I will keep your sorrow, and never let go ♪
♪ 把我的悲伤留给自己 ♪ ♪ I lay the sadness, inside of my heart ♪
♪ 你的美丽让你带走 ♪ ♪ You take the beauties, into your heart ♪
♪ 从此以后 ♪ ♪ Hereafter ♪
♪ 我再没有快乐起来的理由 ♪ ♪ I have no reason, to gained my happiness ♪
♪ 把我的悲伤留给自己 ♪ ♪ I lay the sadness, inside of my heart ♪
♪ 你的美丽让你带走 ♪ ♪ You take the beauties, into your heart ♪
♪ 我想我可以忍住悲伤 ♪ ♪ I believe I could waiting for my love to wake up ♪
♪ 可不可以你也会想起我 ♪ ♪ Can you please do, show me your heart ♪
你有没有听过一种没有脚的鸟 Have you ever heard a bird called phoenix?.
从出生就开始飞 死的时候才落地 It lives and burn till death
我觉得自己就像那只鸟 I feel myself strongly like that bird!.
这疤还能补吗 Can this scar fixable?.
小鞋匠 Little Cobbler!.
你怎么回来了呀 Why did you come back?.
你伤了我的脚 我还没有找你算帐 You hurt my feet, I need to get even with you
我才不会便宜你呢 Don't you worry!.
我会负责任的 I'll fully responsible for it!.
皇上…皇上没来吗 Is Emperor here now?.
没有 Nope...
你不会又是逃婚出来的吧 Don't tell me you ran away again?.
不告诉你 I'm not gonna tell you...
你…真的很喜欢他 Do you... really like him?.
愿意为他放弃一切 Willing to sacrifice everything for him?.
他有什么好的 Why is so good to you?.
他会补鞋 你会吗 He knows how to fix shoes, do you?.
你走吧 走 You may go now!. Go!.
好好过日子 Take care!.
那你这次还会走吗 Are you gonna leave again?.
看你表现 Only if you do good...
你上回不是说你是一只没有脚的鸟的吗 Didn't you tell me you are a phoenix with no feet last time?.
你看 如果你这次没有回来的话 Look!. If you didn't come back
我就把他孵出来陪我 I'll wait till it comes out and live with...
现在我回来了 待会把他煮了吃了吧 Since I am back now, let's cook it!.
不要吧 Not even!.
我想吃嘛 But I am hungry
西红柿炒蛋、鱼香烘蛋、生煎荷包蛋 We can have scramble egg, steam egg, and more!.
你太残忍了 You so cruel!.
我不管 我跟他只能选一个 I don't care!. You can only pick one!.
你为什么跟蛋计较啊 Compare you and egg?.
我就是爱计较嘛 Yes, I love comparison
那好吧 那我选蛋 Oh well... I'll pick the egg
你欠揍 You better not!.
我选蛋 I'll not pick you
欠揍 Better not!.
就选蛋 Only egg...
等一下… Wait...
多年以后 人们都习惯称他为剑圣 Years later, people call him The Sword God
按照约定 他改姓了独孤 And he changed his name to Lonesome as he promised
至于名字 我想你应该知道 At last, we all know better what his first name is!.
♪ 我是随风飘摇的小草 ♪
♪ 冲破泥土拥进蓝天怀抱 ♪
♪ 用尽全身力气只想你知道 ♪
♪ 我可以做到最好 ♪
♪ 人在江湖纷纷扰扰 ♪
♪ 身在其中的人才会知道 ♪
♪ 世上有多少事能把握好 ♪
♪ 又何必这这样自寻烦恼 ♪
♪ 笑江湖 江湖笑 ♪
♪ 多少英雄竟折腰 ♪
♪ 天下第一的苦 ♪
♪ 没有人知道 ♪
♪ 笑江湖 江湖笑 ♪
♪ 儿女情长谁明了 ♪
♪ 盖世神功练到 ♪
♪ 无可救药 ♪
♪ 人在江湖纷纷扰扰 ♪
♪ 身在其中的人才会知道 ♪
♪ 世上有多少事能把握好 ♪
♪ 又何必这这样自寻烦恼 ♪
♪ 笑江湖 江湖笑 ♪
♪ 多少英雄竟折腰 ♪
♪ 天下第一的苦 ♪
♪ 没有人知道 ♪
♪ 笑江湖 江湖笑 ♪
♪ 儿女情长谁明了 ♪
♪ 盖世神功练到 ♪
♪ 无可救药 ♪
♪ 笑江湖 江湖笑 ♪
♪ 多少英雄竟折腰 ♪
♪ 天下第一的苦 ♪
♪ 没有人知道 ♪
♪ 笑江湖 江湖笑 ♪
♪ 儿女情长谁明了 ♪
♪ 盖世神功练到 无可救药 ♪